the evening  


I was scared.

fuck I really was. when she reached out and her hands penetrated my outer layer I felt this sudden grip of fear

her head was turned away and her eyes were fixed on a point in the distance …

as usual …

as always when we talk


it felt like as if she held my stomach in palms of her hands … just for a short while … and then she moved gently backwards shaking her head as she always does

she smiled gently talking about some sad experience from her past

I can’t tell how real the transmission was but I didn’t want to break the connection

I think I stopped caring at that point …

later I was told I passed out which is why the pilot shocked me out

I still have the scars on my neck where the skin was burnt by electric charge

I look at them in the mirror everyday



Now read this

cold metal

i knew it all too well the choices and absolute inescapability of one option taking over the other as cold as any metallic part could ever be sure some would call it psychosis but then again what else is there? a lie, elusive middle, the... Continue →