a speck of dust in the sandstorm of information

it’s such a pleasant and quiet evening. very hot after hot day but now I can feel chilling breeze cutting through the dense air.

the storm seems just moments away but it might as well not come at all.

… and here comes the rain.

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back inside.

the cat sleeping on an empty bed.

tea. cigarette. silence.

I feel almost at peace

kind of happy

I will lay down in bed in a moment trying to fall asleep. but I won’t. I’ll be thinking about all the work I haven’t done today.

and how lost i feel there even though i know every corner of the fabric on this side

i don’t even enjoy the data flow the same as i used to do

it’s all so mellow and almost tasteless

I don’t know where you are and what bed you are sleeping in tonight. I’m slowly learning not to care anymore.

I can still remember the other night.

the sad song you sang,

your words telling me that you love me,

and the sex.

the wind made the pictures fall off the walls making me feel even more alone in the darkness

i remember touching the construct, the beauty of it’s illusory body and the colours falling through my fingers on first touch.

all we are is just this, a speck of dust in the sandstorm of information …

… attached to our physical bodies

i smile thinking about this craving i feel so intensely now i could almost cut through it with a knife

the closeness of another human body

is it still me?

always defiant, always on the other side, embracing the virtual representations of our physical worlds and now hungry for … touch?

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i will have to start looking for someone like you.

to replace you.

even though I don’t want to.

 
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hello I’m sorry for breaching the usual protocol but I don’t want to be making a public query. I can commit some of the resources I have left for this cycle and could arrange further commits if needed. however I would like to do so via... Continue →